This week was rough with some good stuff thrown in.
It started out last Sunday by visiting my Dad. My brother and I had visited him the previous Thursday and we were starting to see a shift in his health. That Thursday day we got a text from one of the nurses that he was irritated because one of the med technicians was trying to shave him, he had formed a fist and was getting ready to punch them when the nurse walked in and stopped it. Totally unusual behavior for my Dad. He seemed more confused (than usual) about who us kids were, and had difficulty having a conversation. The next two mornings we received Voice Messages that he had fallen in the night. We decided to visit him on Sunday again to assess the situation. He was noticeably weaker, he had a difficult time getting in and out of his chair, difficult time walking, and just seemed generally weaker. We brought him dinner and had Philly Cheese sandwiches with him and although his appetite is getting smaller he ate on his own. We asked his facility for a walker (not that he would use it) and they also mentioned they thought he may have a bladder infection.
Monday was the start of the last week of school for Trey. He has been having migraines again. I have had to pick him early from school more than once in the past week. Monday I got the call a little earlier than usual to pick him up and he said his headache was worse than ever. Trey has not had a normal school year ending in two years because of COVID in his 5th-grade year and migraines his 6th-grade year. I just want him to take his finals and for this year to end happily.
Tuesday his headache and stomach ache were pretty bad, he stayed home from school and missed his PE Final. Oh well. I talked to his neurologist and she recommended he start taking one of the migraine prescriptions he was given a year ago when he started having the migraines. He just needs to make it through two half days.
Tuesday night I was in my office and Trey came in to hang out. He has been taking a Computer Science class, which he really enjoys, and there was a project he had really put a lot of time into and he couldn't get the code to work. He told me he checked his grades and they were better than he thought. Well, that is great news. He told me he got a 100% on a project that he didn't think he did very well on. Well, then that is Fantastic news. He started crying, I asked him why he was crying because you can't get better than 100%. He said he didn't think he did very well on the presentation and he messed up on some parts of it. Then he had a dream that he got a 40%. He was dreading checking his grades. He was so happy and relieved when he finally checked his grade that he was shedding tears of joy. That was a good thing.
Wednesday/Thursday-Trey made it through the end of the school year, the headaches are better once he started taking the meds. Apparently, he missed one last Algebra assignment on Tuesday. His teacher was very kind to give him the worksheet and let him work on it Thursday evening even though the school year had ended. He was able to turn it in and he ended up with a C in the class, which I'm ok with. He did struggle this year in Algebra. We will take a C and be happy with it for now, but I'm going to have him do some brushup of Algebra over the summer. That was a good thing
Thursday afternoon my Brother and I went to visit my Dad. We had spoken with Hospice earlier in the week, they were going to take him off his meds and just keep him comfortable. When we arrived on Thursday my dad seemed very incoherent. There was a woman by his bed tucking him in and talking to him. Turns out she was another Memory care resident thinking he was one of her kids. We redirected her and sent her on her way. That is such a sad place, I hate that my dad has had to be there for the past 4 years. The nurse said he was only eating food that was easy to get down like soup and ice cream. She fed him while we were there. I still don't know how he seemed pretty incoherent, but still having tremors in his hands.
Friday- the Hospice nurse updates us and there is a definite decline in my Dad. We his oxygen level has dropped from 97 to 90 he can no longer swallow. Darrell and I stayed until about 5:00, then we came back at about 9:00 p.m. and stayed until 11:30 p.m.. I don't think my Dad was even aware we were there. He seemed more restful than the previous day.
Between visits, Curtis and I had tickets to this exhibit at Phoenix Botanical Gardens. I had never been there and I thought this exhibit looked pretty cool. This artist did blown glass displays among the plants at the botanical gardens. It was very cool to see lit up at night. The kids always went to the Botanical Gardens for field trips. I had heard multiple kids say it was the most boring field trip. I have to admit I don't think that is a very interesting field trip for the kids during the daytime to just look at cacti.
Saturday morning we had planned to go back at about 9:30 to be with my Dad, we wanted to be there when hospice checked on him. Right as I was getting to walk out the door, Hospice called and said my Dad had significantly declined overnight his heart was racing, he had a fever, and his body was showing signs of shutting down and he thought my dad would pass within a few hours.
The usual drill, I met my brother there, the hospice nurse was still there for a bit. My dad had "Death Rattles", which when it just sounds like wheezing to breathe but it isn't. A sign of death. His breathing was more labored. About 11:00 the CNA came in and gave him more morphine we started talking about all my Dad's dog that have died because "All Dogs go to heaven" he took a few gasps, there was no pulse and I could see a tear coming out of his eye. I think he made it to the other side, greeting his dogs and my Mom. definitely a bitter-sweet moment. I checked my watch it was 11:28 a.m.
It has been so hard these past several years watching him decline with dementia and not enjoying life. We always felt like putting him in Memory care was a prison for him, but we didn't have any other options. I'm so happy he got out of that prison. We will miss you, Dad, you were such a hard worker, you loved all nature, the outdoors, and animals. Rest In Peace, we love you.
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